On the 1 year anniversary of the inauguration of Barack Obama as the first non-retarded president of the 21st century, Americans eagerly logged on to see the thrilling conclusion to the epic webcomic, Fafnir the Dragon in: Barack To The Future.
Widely believed to have been a ground-breaking tell-all about the apocalyptic future that America barely avoided 1 year ago today, Barack To the Future reveals how all of America’s problems can be resolved with just a little faith in the basic goodness of human nature  . . . along with having a time-traveling dragon dissolve Rush Limbaugh in salt and set fire to Dick Cheney’s head.

In celebration of this time-traveling epic, America decided to conduct their own time-travel experiment by replacing Democrat Ted Kennedy’s critical Senate seat with Republican Scott Brown, thus breaking the Democrats 60-seat supermajority and bringing the already tedious lawmaking process to a grinding halt.

“When I voted for Obama back in 2008, I was under the impression that he would use his magic genie powers to fix the economy by now,” exclaimed Jeremy Powers, a registered Independent voter from Massachusetts.  “But I don’t see any oompa-loompa’s lining the streets with lollipops or installing a chocolate waterfall in my living room!  YOU HAVE FAILED US OBAMA!”

Matt Coleman, another Independent Massachusetts voter had a slightly different take.
“I was getting sick and tired of this president and his incessant need to follow the Constitution, show basic respect to other nations and attempt to be bi-partisan.  Booooring!  I want a politician who will make a bunch of wild claims, imposable promises and threats that he never backs up!  In other words, the Jerry Springer Show!”

Mister Coleman then paused to snort some glue before continuing.

“The moment I heard Scott Brown agree with that supporter who wanted to “stick a curling iron up Mrs. Coakley’s butt,’ I knew that I had found my man!  Gimmie that good-ol’ politics of 2002!”

As he emerged into the White House Press Room, President Obama was asked to comment regarding the day’s events.

“Hey, if you’ve read about what I went through in the pages of Barack To the Future, you should know that traveling time and saving the earth from a mutant, Al-Quada supervirus was a pretty good accomplishment for the year,” the President said.  “So f**k the supermajority, those retards in the Senate didn’t know what to do with it anyways!  Now if you’ll excuse me I have to go help tar-and-feather Martha Coakley for assuming that Ted Kennedy’s ghost would win her the election.”